From the category archives:

Childhood development

This column also appears in the online edition of the September-October, 2010 issue of  The Therapist Magazine, the publication of the California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists.

Abstract: This two-part series will explore the ways that the symbolic exploration of film imagery during the brief, one-year analysis of a patient suffering from the effects of very early trauma expanded his capacity to engage and begin to integrate unformulated and dissociated aspects of himself for the first time.  Just as elements in a dream clothe the invisible man of the psyche, each movie element and character, by giving voice to personal feelings and meanings in novel and mutative ways, increased the mentalization of lived experience that had never before existed in the realm of conscious thought.

If a myth represents a collective dream, a dream signifies a personal myth written in the language of affect-laden imagery.

Nothing permits us such lush access to the workings of the unconscious mind like a rich dream.  For brief moments, dreamer and analyst breach what Jacques Lacan called the “gap” (Lacan 1977/1978) between conscious and unconscious thought and clothe this mostly invisible psychic man.  Examining each symbolic garment, we are able to apprehend and construe metaphors and personal meanings that might otherwise just flicker briefly like passing afternoon shadows across a dimly lit wall.

The Newborn

The newborn

Dream imagery is potent for significant reasons.  Imagery is the “vocabulary” of an infant’s first post-natal language.  A neonate gazes into his mother’s face as she gazes back, communicating deeply held feelings long before the capacity for spoken language is acquired.  An infant’s first smile is in response to her gaze of acknowledgment.  Because she sees him, he will begin to see himself.

Throughout life we associate enlightened consciousness with insight, creativity with vision.  Even as our modes of verbal communication expand developmentally and refine themselves over time, imagery conveys what words sometimes can’t quite capture.  Jacques Lacan (Lacan 1977/1978) referred to unspeakable (or unspoken) lived experience as the Real.  Sometimes a picture is worth a thousand words.

In our culture, movie imagery is the bridge linking social mythology with personal dreamscapes, connecting inner subjective experience and the cultural collective.  We analyze movie details symbolically and metaphorically as if we were deconstructing a dream.

As a result, we often begin to conceptualize parts of ourselves in new and original ways, perhaps even identifying and claiming dissociated aspects that have never yet been acknowledged or fully mentalized (Fonagy 1981), parts that have lived only through the dramatization of enactment (Stern 2010).  Parts considered “not me” have an opportunity to be transformed into “me.”

During a year-long analysis with Q, a young man who had been abandoned as an infant, long before he’d acquired sufficient verbal language to process or organize his trauma, movie imagery opened up a psychological third space (Ogden 1994) that bridged our worlds.

Without film imagery and art, we might have remained forever isolated from one another, he imprisoned in his tragic past and I in my chair across the room.

He and I often talked about movies when he was struggling to articulate an unbearable feeling or perhaps avoiding one.  The Matrix was one of his favorites, a movie I’d never seen except in fragments on television.  I liked movies about relationships so had never found it appealing.  Just prior to my early summer break, he loaned me his copy, so that the lace-like threads of our connection might not tear.  I tucked it in my briefcase where it remained until the last day of my break.  When I popped it into the DVD player, I felt him enter the room.

The Persistence of Memory

The persistence of memory

This is the dream.  The Matrix is a computer age, film noir movie reminiscent of earlier classics with similar anti-utopian themes.  Soylent Green was the dire environmental prophecy of the 1970’s. The 1960’s dangled ingénue Yvette Mimieux in The Time Machine, both examples of a depraved and desperate future.  Donald Winnicott’s iconic paper Fear of Breakdown (Winnicott 1974) described how the anxiously feared catastrophe looming “out there” in the future had actually transpired long ago.  The Matrix future is portrayed as the degenerate past.

In The Matrix vision of the future, people, like the zombies in one of Q’s recurrent dreams, feed off one another from within the matrix of an artificial, bleakly mechanistic environment.

Lawrence Hedges (1994) described the ways in which people functioning at an organizing/psychotic level prefer objects to people.  Guntrip (1995) examined the mechanistic qualities that characterize affectively withdrawn schizoid states often described by patients as empty and depersonalized.  Capable of living an intellectually efficient but impersonal outer life, Q relied upon fantasy to keep himself alive.  A pseudo-adult, a militarily taut exterior substituted for a more authentic and self-assured manliness.

At this archaic organizing level, Q found safety in the realm of things rather than people, though longed to escape his own matrix web and, therefore, found the movie quite compelling.  He watched it over and over and had several copies.  Infants were manufactured and then cannibalized to sustain the controlling artificial life forms, the reverse of caring human motherhood, whereby the mother nourishes her child.

Woman and Child

Woman and child

We are offered a psychotic, biblical end-time image signifying the loss of the maternal, of purity and empathic human concern, a model as remote from Winnicott’s (1953) good-enough mother as the cold and transparent man in the moon.  Reality deconstructed, it floated unmoored from comforting illusions.

Q struggled to differentiate waking from sleeping states, reality from illusion, believing he was the product of some “higher” agency, convinced that I existed only as a product of his own mind.  Experiencing himself as a non-corporeal entity having no mass or substance, indicative of the unorganized-organizing self that has yet to come into being, he ascribed the same hollow qualities to my existence.  If it doesn’t really exist, it can’t hurt me, I thought to myself as I watched the movie, listened to the dream.   Am I real or am I illusion?  Is there a baby without a mother?  Is there a mother without a baby? “I want someone to give a shit,” Q often said to me.

Q’s original trauma, initiated at conception and concretized when he was six months old, was the initial severing of psychic and then physical connection to mother who, after reproducing selfishly and thoughtlessly (mechanically), found herself unable to care for her infant and gave him away six months later.  He was transported out of state.

End times occur when your mother does not want you, and your (unknown) father wanted you aborted.

This horror becomes the template for your future, depicted as the decrepit past over and over on the screen of your mind, the origin of Q’s belief that he was “too much” for everyone.  His tiny infant self was too much for mother, too much for father.  Yet he loved his mother and raged that his love had been insufficient to keep her bound to him.  “What’s in this for you?” he often asked me.

Q relived this trauma daily, though had adorned himself in hero’s cloaks to disguise his fragility.  His organizing principle* dictated that serviceability and brilliance would garner meaningful interpersonal connections.  “I’m the only sane person in my family,” he often said.  “I try to advise the best I can.  Why else would anyone want me around?” he asked wanly.  Saving others from destruction, he struggled to save himself.   His pain and intellectual expansiveness mirrored an autistic and psychotic inner landscape.  Anguish kept him alive, pain being better than nothingness and the psychic void of emptiness (see Grotstein 1990).

His two-year military enlistment afforded one such opportunity to both enact this role and immerse himself in fraternity.  Q sought surrogacy everywhere, yet self and object constancy eluded him.  There were only particles and waves that dodged substantiality like bad TV reception.

Black pixels coalesced into Darth Vader, the father who abandoned, yet was ultimately able to redeem himself.

Q embodied and acted out both parts, the hero and the unknowable, treacherous, dark father who threatened to abort and consume like Kronos the Titan god who killed his father and devoured his children.

There is a gruesome scene in The Matrix whereby an infant, every orifice penetrated by black tubes, is either being fed liquefied human remains or is itself being consumed, posing Q’s terrible paradox – eat or be eaten – an endless enactment of doer or done-to (Benjamin 2004).  The therapeutic environment offered a third possibility, that of collaboration and co-creation, the possibility of achieving self and object constancy, the hope of experiencing object usage and living viability in an uncontaminated present.

The conclusion of this two-part series will appear in the November/December online edition of The Therapist, Volume 22, Issue 5.

* Deeply held emotional truths driving beliefs, thoughts and behavior that are not necessarily accurate.

WARNING! This text is printed for the personal use of the subscriber to The Therapist Magazine or Inside Out Journal and is copyrighted by Mauri-Lynne Heller. It is illegal to copy or distribute it in any form whatsoever without the author’s permission.

Benjamin, J. (2004). Beyond doer and done to: An Intersubjective View of Thirdness. Psychoanalytic Quarterly, 73:5-46.

Fonagy, P. (1991). Thinking about thinking: some clinical and theoretical considerations in the treatment of a borderline patient. International Journal of Psycho-Analysis, 72:639-656.

Grotstein, J. (1990). Nothingness, meaninglessness, chaos and the black hole – the importance of nothingness, meaninglessness and chaos in psychoanalysis.  Contemporary Psychoanalysis, 26:257-290.

Guntrip, H. (1995 11th printing). Schizoid phenomena, object relations and the self. Madison, Connecticut, International Universities Press, Inc. (Original publication date unknown)

Hedges, L. (1994). Working the organizing experience. Northvale New Jersey.  Jason Aronson, Inc.

Lacan, J. (1977). Ecrits; A Selection. New York: W.W. Norton & Co. (1973). The Four Fundamental Concepts of Psychoanalysis. New York. W.W. Norton & Co.

Ogden, T.H. (1994). The analytic third: working with intersubjective clinical facts. International Journal of Psycho-Analysis, 75, pp. 3-19.

Stern, D.B. (2010). Partners in thought. New York. Routledge – Taylor & Francis Group.

Winnicott, D.W. (1953). Transitional objects and transitional phenomena—a study of the first not-me possession. International Journal of Psycho-Analysis, 34:89-97.

Winnicott, D.W. (1974). Fear of breakdown. International Review of Psycho-Analysis, 1:103-107.

{ Comments on this entry are closed }

This column also appears in the online edition of the March-April, 2010 issue of  The Therapist Magazine, the publication of the California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists.

Abstract:

Adapted from a presentation to the CAMFT Orange County chapter, this first in a three-part series examines the ways applied contemporary psychoanalytic theory, particularly Intersubjective Systems Theory, with its focus on recognition and mutuality, has refined and expanded our understanding of mental processes and clinical interaction, modifying therapeutic dynamics in ways that promote therapist-client resonance.  Exploring developmental factors and transitional space, the origins of creativity and an expanded definition of the unconscious to include unformulated experience, readers will begin to think innovatively about the shared psychological space in which we work. [click to continue…]

{ Comments on this entry are closed }

This column also appears in the online format of the January-February issue of The Therapist Magazine, the publication of the California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists.  While it was written for clinicians, concepts discussed are readily accessible to any interested reader.

Abstract:

In this column, Dr. Heller examines the clinical limitations of the Positive Psychology model, particularly the ways in which its limited dimensionality forecloses on the therapeutic process of working through and subsequent integration of strong vitality affects.  Rather than obviating the need for defenses like splitting and projection, this model sustains defensive posturing and induces guilt and shame.  Split off and projected affects often develop an independent life of their own where they continue to be acted out in their unmentalized and pre-articulated state.  Self-injurious repercussions frequently accrue from these repetitively abortive attempts to manage difficult feelings.  Literary, film and clinical material are used to illustrate iconic concepts of Donald Winnicott, Wilfred Bion and Melanie Klein. [click to continue…]

{ Comments on this entry are closed }

This column also appears in the Orange County Register.

Once upon a time when the young woman who would become me was a freshman at Cal Berkeley studying French, art history, anthropology, mythology, literature and on weekends, beer and poetic boys with long hair, she was lucky enough to get into a very crowded physical anthropology class taught by a professorial luminary whose name, almost four decades later, I can no longer recall. [click to continue…]

{ Comments on this entry are closed }

On several occasions I’ve written about the ways in which we begin to come into being as unique persons from within an interpersonal mommy-daddy-baby matrix.  The impact of these early interactions are so vital and long-lasting, they inform our behavior and beliefs about relationships for the remainder of our lives. [click to continue…]

{ Comments on this entry are closed }

This column originally appeared in the Orange County Register.

The recent California judicial decision upholding Prop. 8 has inflamed very strong emotional reactions all along the socio-political spectrum regarding the relationship between civil liberties and the private realm of sexuality. [click to continue…]

{ Comments on this entry are closed }

This column originally appeared in the Orange County Register.

America, in its relative youthfulness, still perceives itself as morally, politically and militarily invincible, devoid of the stabilizing historical context that might actually insure the retention of its truly consequential status. [click to continue…]

{ Comments on this entry are closed }

This column originally appeared in the Orange County Register.

Much has been written lately about impulsive behavior, particularly excessive spending or shopping, as its problematic consequences have become increasingly obvious as our economy continues to implode. [click to continue…]

{ Comments on this entry are closed }

This column originally appeared in the Orange County Register.

One more time…

Once again, thin veneers of public pose have cracked exposing very private lives.  So common as to be utterly prosaic, another powerful politician has been caught in an extramarital tryst with a political groupie, a less dominant woman aroused by power. [click to continue…]

{ Comments on this entry are closed }

This column originally appeared in the Orange County Register

A screenwriter friend gave me an article discussing the salutary aspects of sadness and the ways in which our contemporary culture tends to quickly erase it or prematurely foreclose upon its gritty psychological usefulness in a quest for perennial cheery happiness.  As if happiness were a concrete object one could hold instead of a transitory state of being, one of many, that links specific inner notations of experience with external ones. [click to continue…]

{ Comments on this entry are closed }